Men of Leisure Manual...C'mon...You Know You Want One

Becoming a full fledged member of the Men of Leisure Society is actually a rather simple process...the only prerequisite is loss of employment. How that comes about is rather inconsequential - your position may have been "eliminated" or you may have been terminated for "cause" or hell, perhaps you got caught ordering Seamless Web meals on other colleagues' accounts one too many times...whether it be downsizing, poor performance or a hearty appetite that brought you to the precipice, rest assured the Men of Leisure Society will be there...don't get me wrong, we won't try to talk you down from the ledge or even provide a safety net below if you do jump...we really kind just want to see if you bounce when you take the plunge; oh, and we'll be taking bets.

That said, if you are able to get your wits about you and decide to at least see if the whole unemployment thing suits you, we'll hand you a crisp new uniform (details on the uniform are still not being made public...we will have an unveiling party in short order) and our Men of Leisure Society Manual, which contains among other things, suggestions on activities one can enjoy, guilt free, even on food stamps and unemployment checks.

Today, we are offering a rare opportunity for the general public - we are pulling back the veil of secrecy on our Society's most guarded possession, known simply as...The Manual. The Manual, as you surely have noted in awe below, is nothing less than a work of art, both in its exterior beauty as well as the brilliant prose contained within. There is a significant amount of symbolic importance to each of the items on and surrounding this magnificent tome.

First, you'll observe the six gold plated rapiers in the background - in eras past, these were used by Men of Leisure to subtly (and sometimes not so subtly) suggest to the King's tax collectors that they should come back another day, for money was a bit "tight" at the moment. Today, the rapiers are still very much an integral part of a Man of Leisure's life, however their use is a touch less noble...they make great letter openers for those unemployment checks, paper shredders for those job rejection letters and they cut that government wheel of cheese like a hot rapier through butter. We do however, dissuade members from bringing them along to job interviews...yes, they very well may project that powerful, go-getter type image prospective employers seek in a candidate, but that employer is more likely a Medieval Times (http://www.medievaltimes.com/home.aspx) than an investment bank or law firm. Trust us; we speak from experience. (Oh...fair warning...might want to check your volume if you click on that link.)

Next, you'll note the treasure chest to the left of The Manual. Hate to break it to you, but if you are a member of the Society, there ain't no treasure in there...for example, that's where I keep my loose change and every so often I plan a field trip over to the Commerce Bank down the street to use their handy coin machine counter. I highly recommend this activity...not only does it typically result in some extra (and unexpected) scratch to live on, but you get free lollipops, too.

Finally, we have the tome itself, which, as I gaze upon this very minute, is emitting an unmistakable glow. Perhaps it's the knowledge that lies within...perhaps the genuine leather binding, 22k gold accented ornamental cover and thread sewn (not glued) pages cannot fully contain its luminescence. Eh...then again, maybe it's sitting on top of my ringing blackberry....damn it...it's the blackberry...and I've gotta take this call. It's my mom and she's undoubtedly going to interrogate me about what I've done all weekend...man, I hate that conversation...

Until next time,
MJB